We're shadows of our former selves..

With the gate open we discovered that the real gate was in our own minds. Can I ever live up to my former glory? Those unimpeachable days in Norrath when no one ever suggested our methods were anything less than pristine? When I swam in a sea of nubile virgins eager to be regaled with tales of Vulak'Aerr and Phara Dar?

No. And here I must confess - this picture is testament to the depths to which we have sunk. I present to you, my loyal reader, the secret to success - our recipe for sploitastrophe.